Author Topic: Some Punny Funs  (Read 3550 times)

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Offline astroursa

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Some Punny Funs
« on: Tue 04 Aug 2009 22:18:47 »
1.
The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2.
I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .

3.
She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4.
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5.
The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

6.
No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

7.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

8.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

9.
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

10.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

11.
A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

12.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

13.
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, "You stay here; I'll go on a head."

14.
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

15.
A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: "Keep off the Grass."

16.
A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, "No change yet."

17.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

18.
The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

19.
The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

20.
A backward poet writes inverse.

21.
In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.

22.
When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

23.
Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!