Author Topic: Stimulus Payment Info.  (Read 5963 times)

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Offline deutros

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Stimulus Payment Info.
« on: Sat 14 Feb 2009 15:53:57 »
Stimulus Payment Info.
 

 

"This year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment. This is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A format:

 

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?

A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

 

Q. Where will the government get this money?

A. From taxpayers.

 

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?

A. Only a smidgin.

 

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?

A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set or some such thing, thus stimulating the economy.

 

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?

A. Shut up.

 

 

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the Australian economy by spending your stimulus cheque wisely:

 

If you spend that money at Kmart, all the money will go to China .

If you spend it on petrol it will go to the Arabs.

If you purchase a computer it will go to India .

If you buy a car it will go to Japan .

If you purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan .

 

And none of it will help the Australian economy.

 

We need to keep that money here in Australia.  You can keep the money in Australia by spending it at garage sales, going to a cricket match or footy game, or spend it on prostitutes, beer and wine (domestic ONLY), or tattoos, since those are the only businesses that may still be owned by Aussies

 
 

Offline JestaCat

Re: Stimulus Payment Info.
« Reply #1 on: Sun 31 May 2009 16:44:14 »
I spent mine in Canada. . .  I guess that didn't help Ruddy's plan either. . . ooops.! :)
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Offline MattyA

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Re: Stimulus Payment Info.
« Reply #2 on: Tue 30 Jun 2009 03:14:21 »
Buying old Aussie CDs from Amazon doesn't help our economy either!!!
 

Offline No_Exit

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Re: Stimulus Payment Info.
« Reply #3 on: Tue 30 Jun 2009 07:22:56 »
hmmm, footy, beer & a prostitute. sounds like a stimulating day for me  ;D